Eyes on the prom

I find that (at least for women) a hairdresser's appointment is a great way to mark a new beginning. Going to the hairdresser is very much like a therapy session. You go for the hairstyle but come out feeling refreshed and lighter. It's a chance to recreate and pamper ourselves and to review our life since the last appointment (like a checkpoint). This is the first appointment this year. Spring is the best time to get your "blues" cut off. The sun is out and inviting the outdoors. And we want to be our best selves after this long "hibernation" period.

With her eyes set on the prom, my daughter's having her first dying experience. "Balayage", she says excitedly. "I'm so scared! What if it doesn't turn out as I imagine?", she offloaded, to which I responded "It'll grow back.' Although it is a double appointment, this appointment is really a reward for all her effort in her studies this year. No, her attendance has not been near perfect, she has got her hurdles to get through, but she hasn't completely given up either and I'm proud of her for it.

I would like to take the half term (which I usually don’t get to be off for) to spend some quality time with her, some mum and daughter time, go through what dress she would like to take to the prom and catch up. Although I know she wants to feel older and sexy in it, I also know she doesn’t like to be the centre of attention so I’m confident she’s not going to embarrass herself by going overboard and will make a sober choice.

When we came out of the hairdresser’s she was ecstatic, happy and smiling like I have not seen her smile for years. As she looked herself in the mirror she could now see HERSELF. That self that she thought she’d lost. This was a top-up to making her way through her GCSEs and feeling successful on the other end. It has been a long and winding road. An outcome she could not foresee until she was in the thick of it. And now she’s there and can actually see a more positive outcome about her future and see the possibilities. All of a sudden building a vision board is no longer daunting.

My children’s happiness is my priority. When they’re not happy I start doubting my parenting capabilities. It makes me overthink and make wrong judgements, not only about me but about them. I don’t always get the luxury of quality time to go over everything, which is wrong. Life is so short and mostly meaningless if we’re not willing to put in the effort.

The prom (provided her poor attendance does not prevent her from going) is the reaching of a milestone. With the weather boosting both of our moods, we are finally getting to a good position in our relationship, where there is less friction. I feel like we have come to the end of a period where it felt like we couldn’t understand each other. I was very close to throwing the towel… And behold! Spring brought a whole new her!